Geri-Lynn Utter of Orexo: How to Live with Joie De Vivre, Even When It Feels Like The Whole World Is Pulling You Down

An Interview With Fotis Georgiadis

Life is too short. Take the vacation: Seriously, what are you waiting for?! Again, I am the first to raise my hand high because I, too, am guilty of this. It’s like I am always putting off opportunities that will bring me happiness or joy because I don’t feel worthy enough to accept them yet. It is almost as if there is this arbitrary scoreboard in my mind based on subjective measures of success (like a promotion or a raise) that are being tallied-up to determine if I am good enough to do something enjoyable for myself. I swear, most of the time we are our own worst enemies!

It sometimes feels like it is so hard to avoid feeling down or depressed these days. Between the sad news coming from world headlines, the impact of the ongoing raging pandemic, and the constant negative messages popping up on social and traditional media, it sometimes feels like the entire world is pulling you down. What do you do to feel happiness and joy during these troubled and turbulent times? In this interview series called “Finding Happiness and Joy During Turbulent Times,” we are talking to experts, authors, and mental health professionals who share lessons from their research or experience about “How To Find Happiness and Joy During Troubled & Turbulent Times.”

As a part of this series, I had the pleasure of interviewing Geri-Lynn Utter, PsyD., Clinical Psychologist and Medical Science Liaison with Orexo.

Geri Lynn Utter, PsyD. is a Licensed Clinical Psychologist who specializes in working with individuals diagnosed with both substance use disorders and severe mental illness. Throughout her career, she has conducted psychological evaluations for the courts on incarcerated individuals to ensure they receive the appropriate mental health and drug and alcohol treatment during and post-release from prison. Currently, Dr. Utter works on the Medical Affairs Team at Orexo Pharmaceuticals, a specialty pharmaceutical company dedicated to developing and manufacturing medication designed to help individuals with opioid dependence. In April of 2020, she released her first book, Mainlining Philly: Survival, Hope and Resisting Drug Addiction, which came from her desire to share her story and instill hope. The book is based largely on experiences and challenges that she faced in life due to her parents’ struggles with drugs and alcohol abuse. It also encompasses a short Addiction Handbook designed to offer psychoeducation about addiction and mental illness.

Thank you so much for joining us in this interview series! Before we dive into the main focus of our interview, our readers would love to “get to know you” a bit better. Can you tell us a bit about your childhood backstory?

How much time do you have?! My childhood was filled with love, chaos and dysfunction. My parents struggled with drug and alcohol issues that had a direct impact on my life and worldview. Addiction is a family disease and the consequences they suffered because of their addiction were also suffered by me. There were times when I had no idea where my next meal was coming from or where I was going to live — and that was scary (even angering at times) because my parent’s drug and alcohol use always came before me, their child.

However, I would not change my upbringing or even trade my parents for a second. Without them and the experiences I had with them throughout my life — both good and bad — I would not be who I am today. I would surely not be a psychologist dedicated to working with people who struggle with drug and alcohol abuse in conjunction with other mental health concerns like trauma, depression and anxiety.

What or who inspired you to pursue your career? We’d love to hear the story.

There are two people who inspired me to pursue my career as a psychologist.

The first person was my therapist. I know, it sounds crazy, right? In my early- to mid-twenties, I pursued a career in marketing and advertising. I landed a sweet gig selling radio advertising for a Top 40 radio station in the Philadelphia market — and loved it! The competitiveness and hustle that came with the territory of slinging airtime was something I thrived on — but at the same time, I felt like I was always treading water. After a couple of years of slinging spots, the pressure grew more intense. I think a large part of that was because I also assumed full-time responsibility for my half-sister because my mom and her dad were struggling with opioid addiction. I felt anxious and needed to talk with someone — and that’s how I started seeing Dr. Howard Cohen, a psychologist.

I remember sinking into his crème-colored leather couch and clutching one of the small pillows that decorated his sofa — pouring my heart out, crying. And, if anyone knows me, they know that crying was never something I felt comfortable doing. Through our sessions, I started to realize that I wanted to give the same comfort and support to others that he gave to me. He encouraged me to pursue my dream of becoming a psychologist. Though it was a road full of potholes, I managed to accomplish my goal.

The second person was my dad. Imagine what it feels like to be on the receiving end of a person’s complete belief in you and your abilities. That was my dad. No matter what I wanted to do and how unattainable it felt to me, he would look me straight in the eyes, with a confident arrogance, and say to me, “Kid, you can do anything you put your mind to.” He was the ultimate salesman and he sold me on believing in myself. Thanks, Dad!

Can you share the funniest or most interesting mistake that occurred to you in the course of your career? What lesson or take away did you learn from that?

The field that I work in and the populations I have chosen to work with are filled with heavily charged emotions. Mental health professionals work tirelessly to make others feel comfortable and safe to share some of their most vulnerable and heart-wrenching experiences. So, there is a level of seriousness that we innately carry as guardians of our clients’ feelings and emotions.

However, there was a time when I was moderating a group-therapy session with adolescents between the ages of 14- and 17-years-old. At the time, I was very pregnant with my first child. The room was decorated with about 10-or-so folding chairs, laid out in a large circle to support the group format. I was the last person to enter the room and make my way toward one of the folding chairs. My center of gravity was off — what with the growing belly and all — and as I turned to sit down, I wasn’t paying attention, and landed right on my butt, missing the chair completely! The kids and I got a good laugh that day before starting group. They rushed to help me up, but I was laughing so hard that I needed a minute to get my bearings before attempting to get back up on my feet. What I learned from that experience was to not take myself so seriously all the time and that it is “ok,” and even beneficial, for clients to see the human in you.

What are some of the most interesting or exciting projects you are working on now?

I work in the Medical Affairs Department for Orexo US., a company that specializes in medications designed to help individuals with opioid use disorder (OUD). More recently, Orexo has been innovative in its approach in helping individuals who struggle with OUD, problematic drinking and depression through the development and commercialization of digital therapeutics, which are online programs that deliver medical treatment, management and prevention for a broad spectrum of diseases and disorders. They’re different from the traditional “apps” that you might be thinking of in that they’re held to similar standards of testing and oversight that are required of traditional medical treatments.

I have had the opportunity to be involved in the development of MODIA™, a digital therapeutic indicated to provide the behavioral-health component for individuals who are receiving medications for OUD. MODIA™ is a unique program because it is designed to use psychology via an intelligent software program to support and teach individuals healthy coping strategies to combat the bad behaviors and cravings associated with abusing opioids. I am really excited to be involved in innovating new tools and approaches to help this patient population.

For the benefit of our readers, can you briefly let us know why you are an authority about the topic of finding joy?

To be honest, I would not consider myself an authority on finding joy. However, I do consider myself a dedicated student or athlete who consistently strives (“strive” being the key word) to live my life in way that allows me to experience and feel joy. Let’s not forget that I am also a psychologist — and if you know anything about psychologists, we spend our lives learning what makes people tick. Joy is an emotion that does not get the attention it deserves as it relates to its influence on the human psyche. So, being given the opportunity to share my thoughts about it makes me feel, well, joyful!

Ok, thank you for all of that. Let’s now shift to the main focus of our interview about finding joy. Even before the pandemic hit, the United States was ranked at #19 in the World Happiness Report. Can you share a few reasons why you think the ranking is so low, despite all of the privileges and opportunities that we have in the US?

I am not surprised to learn that the US was ranked #19 on the World Happiness Report. If I am being honest, I would have placed us lower on the scoreboard. There is an array of variables — from socioeconomics to governance and social media to addiction — that I believe go into this ranking.

The human experience is about connectedness. People, by sheer nature of being human, need meaningful contact with one another. From a psychological perspective, we innately turn to others to validate the beliefs we have about ourselves and the world around us. A good example of this is what I referenced earlier about my dad’s faith in me and my abilities. His perception of me empowered me to believe in myself. Sadly, this concept can also be applied to instances when people say negative or derogatory things about you, which can also have the power to knock you down or make you feel bad about yourself.

Now, it was tough enough managing the emotions that were evoked in ourselves by adopting other people’s beliefs about us before social media existed. Platforms like Tik-Tok, Twitter, Instagram and Facebook were developed (I think) with the intent to help people connect with one another more efficiently. However, what I have observed, especially among adolescents, is an increase in depression and anxiety due to the feedback they receive about themselves from peers on social media. For example, a teen takes the plunge and posts themselves doing a make-up tutorial. They believe they did a great job of applying the “perfect face;” however, the feedback they get in the comments section is anything but positive and encouraging. That has the power to destroy a young person’s self-concept. Let me add another layer to this idea. People can receive 100 positive comments about themselves on these platforms — but it is that one nasty comment that most people will obsess over or focus on. The point here is that social media has opened the floodgates for people to constantly receive feedback that is often damaging to their self-concept, which, in turn, impacts their ability to experience happiness.

In the work I do, I have noticed a pattern as it relates to feelings and emotions. People put a significant amount of pressure on themselves to try and attain a constant state of happiness. What is up with that? If I hear one more person say, “I always try to be positive and happy,” my southern-Italian temper is going to shine through!

All kidding aside, the human condition is made up of a library of emotions and feelings that can fluctuate within days, hours, and even minutes. It is OKAY to have a bad day, and I encourage you to not feel bad about it. Even the best of us feels like crap sometimes. The goal is to try to sit with the emotion, accept how you are feeling and do your best to not let it consume you.

When it comes to drug and alcohol addiction, there are many ideas related to why we are seeing such an increase in abuse, and one idea is that people are abusing drugs and alcohol to feel better, feel happy and get relief from sadness, loneliness, and high levels of stress. In other words, people may be “self-medicating” mental health concerns like depression and anxiety by abusing drugs and alcohol. Dealing with depression, anxiety, and trauma on your own can lead to subconscious drug and alcohol abuse. What really irks me is that we have nurtured an environment where people don’t feel safe or comfortable reaching out for mental health treatment. If we, as a society, were more open and less stigmatizing about mental concerns, people may be more inclined to seek out treatment before their drug and alcohol use spirals out of control. Timely, quality and affordable access to mental health treatment must also be adequately addressed.

What are the main myths or misconceptions you’d like to dispel about finding joy and happiness? Can you please share some stories or examples?

Experiencing the feelings of joy and happiness isn’t something that comes from the outside world — it comes from within. Many of us play out scenarios in our heads that we believe will make us happy, like, “If I could just get out of debt, I will be happy,” or, “If I win the lottery, all of my problems will be solved, and I’ll be happy.” Living your life in a way that neglects your own values, beliefs, and goals will not afford you the opportunity to feel happy. Being rich and having an unlimited supply of money will not bring you genuine joy. Of course, being able to buy a brand-new sports car, put the top down and drive along the Amalfi Coast sounds like a dream for many (it’s one of mine!), but what allows you to truly enjoy these experiences in life is having a solid foundation in how you feel about yourself.

Here is the main question of our discussion. Can you please share with our readers your “5 things you need to live with more Joie De Vivre, more joy and happiness in life, particularly during turbulent times?” (Please share a story or an example for each.)

1. Self-love and acceptance: You are probably thinking to yourself, “What is this quack talking about, this sounds a little too corny for me.” Just bear with me for a minute. Joy and happiness are feelings and emotions that you cannot truly experience until you can look in the mirror — love, respect and accept the reflection staring back at you. Joy and happiness come from within, not from the outside. A brand-new Aston Martin DB11 or Brazilian Butt Lift (BBL) will make you feel good, but it does not last. None of us are perfect or infallible. We all have imperfections, tendencies, or character traits that we don’t like or wish we didn’t have (no matter who we are), and that is okay. In this life, striving for perfection might sound attainable, but we are too often left feeling like we failed. Learning how to love and accept yourself with all your flaws and shortcomings will afford you the opportunity to experience true joy.
2. Try to appreciate things that we often take for granted: I’ll share a personal story that I’m sure may resonate with a lot of you. A little over a month ago, I got sick. I was suffering with headaches and fatigue. One morning, I woke up and could not smell or taste my coffee. You all see where this is going, right? So, I went to urgent care, got tested for COVID-19 and, surprise — it was positive! After receiving confirmation that I had COVID-19, the ominous monster that drastically changed life as we knew it, it felt a little surreal. Then my mind turned against me and started playing out “worst case scenarios.” I will spare you all the details.
   -Shortly after, I was able to reign in my catastrophizing thoughts. However, the loss of taste and smell was maddening for me, as I am sure it can be for many. Eating your favorite meal or dessert, savoring your first sip of morning coffee or tea, even smelling the summer air after a rainstorm, or soaking up the aroma of a fresh pot of gravy (tomato sauce) with meatballs and Italian sausage is one of life’s happy pleasures that I took advantage of until I couldn’t smell or taste anything. The point I am trying to convey here is that your health (both physical and mental) as well as something like your senses are all things we tend to take for granted — but that also largely contribute to our happiness. Try to remember those little things.
3. Be present: I think a lot of us live life in the “once I get this, I’ll be happy” or “once this happens, I’ll be happy” mindset. In fact, I am guilty of this myself. I remember when I was studying for my licensure exam, I would say to myself, “Once you get your license, you will be easier on yourself because you made it!” Well, that was a bunch of crap, because once I got my license, I didn’t skip a beat and began piling on the next thing that I thought would make me happy or bring me joy. Rather than always looking for the next thing that will bring you joy, try this — stop, breath, and take a brief inventory of what you have today. What is it that brings you joy and happiness right now? It doesn’t have to be something extravagant. It can be something as simple as taking your dog for a walk or spending time with a good friend.
4. Life is too short. Take the vacation: Seriously, what are you waiting for?! Again, I am the first to raise my hand high because I, too, am guilty of this. It’s like I am always putting off opportunities that will bring me happiness or joy because I don’t feel worthy enough to accept them yet. It is almost as if there is this arbitrary scoreboard in my mind based on subjective measures of success (like a promotion or a raise) that are being tallied-up to determine if I am good enough to do something enjoyable for myself. I swear, most of the time we are our own worst enemies!
5. Let it go, and don’t you dare let someone or something steal your joy: What does that mean? Often, it is our own internal dialogue or perceptions that we allow to make us feel sad, disappointed, or frustrated. We “play the tapes” in our minds of what we believe other people think of us. And many times, we tend to lean on the worst-case scenario. I don’t know if you have heard this saying, but it is one that I think drives this point home: “What people think of you or how they feel about you is not of your business!” The message I am trying to communicate with this sassy statement is the way you feel about yourself holds the most power in how you feel. In other words, if you can look at yourself and say, “Not too shabby, I like me. I know I have my flaws, but I like who I am, and feel worthy of the good things that I get to experience in life,” you are well on your way to experiencing joy.

Now, here is my disclaimer for these five tips to live with more joy and happiness. It is okay to have a day when you are in a bad mood or don’t feel happy. We are human and part of the human condition is experiencing an array of emotions. And boy do I have news for you…some of the emotions we experience? They stink. And that’s alright. We aren’t wired for happiness 100% of the time. In fact, if we were, I don’t think we would be able to appreciate or even recognize joy and happiness without the absence of pain and suffering.

I think it is also important to share with you that you do not have to struggle in silence. Don’t be embarrassed or ashamed to reach out for mental health treatment. For me, therapy was an amazing gift. Rather than looking at therapy or any kind of mental health treatment as a “dirty little secret” that you would not dare disclose to anyone in your circle, try to see it as an opportunity to get to know yourself better so that you are better equipped to handle life’s challenges.

What can concerned friends, colleagues, and life partners do to effectively help support someone they care about who is feeling down or depressed?

I know this sounds obvious but…be there. When I say, “be there,” I know that can look very different depending on what your friend might need as well as what you can provide by way of support. For instance, let’s say you have a friend struggling with depression. This friend is a single parent who is doing their best to manage work, their kids’ activities schedule, and their household. Taking care of everyone can be exhausting — even for a two-parent household. To help your friend, it might be a matter of volunteering to pick up or drop off their children from an activity or cooking a meal for their family. Taking away the burden of one or two everyday responsibilities is something that can go a long way for folks who are feeling down or depressed. It also a great way to show you care.

Though you might feel you have to talk about it or offer advice, that may not be the case. Simply “being there” with a nonjudgmental attitude may be all they need. It is not your job to “fix” someone’s depression, but as a friend you can offer support and a safe place for your friend or colleague to confide in when they are having a tough time.

Ok, we are nearly done. You are a person of great influence. If you could inspire a movement that would bring the most amount of good for the greatest number of people, what would that be? You never know what your idea can trigger.

It would be the “Get Real” movement. I think it is part of human nature to idealize others, compare yourself to that idealized version of others that you have created, then attempt to achieve success based on a potentially unrealistic or unattainable goal. For some, this can be motivating and for others this can be defeating, as it all relates back to how you value yourself. In safeguarding your own ego, you can lose sight of your purpose as a human being. And what is that purpose? To find enough meaning and love for yourself that translates to the innate desire to help others. However, what often happens is we seek out material things to make ourselves feel good. Then, we take it a step further by passing judgement on others who don’t have as much. Judging others is stigmatizing; it creates barriers for people to seek mental health treatment. People with mental health concerns and substance use disorders suffer in silence because they are often disenfranchised due to the behaviors they demonstrate because of their mental health issues. For example, “She’s a drug-addict and a junkie so she’s a bad person with no moral compass.”

When I come across people who believe that mental illness and substance use disorders are conditions that people struggle with due to a lack of will power or motivation, I say to myself “Get Real!” I don’t care what you have, who you know or where you are from, you are a human being — vulnerable to mental illness and substance and alcohol abuse issues. Let’s do away with the judgement, humble ourselves, and “Get Real.” If we “Get Real” and dedicate our time helping people instead of judging them, there’s no telling what good it could do for the rest of the world.

We are very blessed that some of the biggest names in Business, VC funding, Sports, and Entertainment read this column. Is there a person in the world, or in the US, whom you would love to have a private breakfast or lunch with, and why? He or she might just see this, especially if we both tag them 🙂

Out of all the questions asked during this interview, I dedicated a lot of time thinking about this one. I thought about who I would like to sit down and talk with who really shares the same level of compassion and commitment to bringing awareness and education about mental health concerns. Who do I think might be interested in sitting down and collaborating on ways we can continue to provide education and awareness on issues like depression, healthy body image, anxiety, and drug and alcohol abuse? So, I did a little research. After I finished, I left feeling as joyful as I was hopeful that there are people out there who genuinely care about their fellow humans.

Here are three people with whom I’d love to share a meal or cup of coffee — or just have a chance to talk with!

1. Zak Williams, (https://twitter.com/zakwilliams), is the creator of mental health support brand, PYM (Prepare Your Mind). Zak, I commend your honesty and your courage in sharing your own mental health struggles with the world, which has helped more people than you might realize. You are helping to stomp out the stigma associated with mental health concerns — and for that, I thank you. I think we are already connected on LinkedIn, but I’m down for coffee, breakfast or lunch anytime!
2. Glenn Close (https://twitter.com/BC2M/), who created the nonprofit, Bring Change 2 Mind, which aims to de-stigmatize mental health. BC2M also has a program geared toward high school students that is aimed at increasing awareness and education about mental health concerns in a safe and comfortable environment. Glenn Close and BC2M, I would love to learn how I can support your mission.
3. Jayde Adams (https://www.instagram.com/msjaydeadams/?hl=en) is a British comedian and writer. Jayde, I just finished watching your stand-up special, Serious Black Jumper, and was really impressed at how you were able to make me laugh while simultaneously discussing topics like feminism, the impact of social media and healthy body image. I would grab a meal with you anytime! #GirlPower

How can our readers further follow your work online?

Website: www.drgerilynn.com

E-mail: [email protected]

Orexo site: https://orexo.com/

Link to book: Mainlining Philly: Survival, Hope and Resisting Drug Addiction Mainlining Philly: Survival, Hope, and Resisting Drug Addiction — Kindle edition by Utter PsyD, Dr. Geri-Lynn. Health, Fitness & Dieting Kindle eBooks @ Amazon.com.

Thank you for these really excellent insights, and we greatly appreciate the time you spent with this. We wish you continued success and good health!

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Geri-Lynn Utter of Orexo: How to Live with Joie De Vivre, Even When It Feels Like The Whole World… was originally published in Authority Magazine on Medium, where people are continuing the conversation by highlighting and responding to this story.